The “Forever Alone” meme is the perfect image of how our culture perceives being alone: crying and unattractive. Contrary to this meme, being alone is wonderful. I don’t mean not having friends or being single, I mean spending time with just yourself. Whether that means traveling across the world alone or just spending a night in reading a book or watching a movie, alone time is greatly undervalued, but is absolutely necessary in people’s lives.

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Over the summer I traveled to Portland, OR. On the way there, I happened to book the same flight as a woman I am friends with, but on the way back I was by myself. My friends dropped me off at the Portland airport, and then I was by myself to figure out where to go and when to be at my gate. I was a little nervous about having to figure out my layover in Chicago, but I knew I would be alright. And I was. Then over winter break I traveled to Philadelphia with family, but I took the Greyhound bus back to Erie. This trip took 14 hours and I had to transfer buses twice. Again, I wasn’t sure how this would go, but it was fine and I actually enjoyed the 14 hours of just getting to stare out the window, listen to music and think.

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For as long as I can remember, I have always enjoyed and campaigned for alone time. In high school I read a lot of books and was happy to spend a weekend reading by myself in my pajamas. I also enjoy spending time with friends and family, but as a self-proclaimed introvert, I need alone time to recharge. Recently I’ve gone to the movie theater several times by myself. I get to jam out in my car alone and just be absorbed in my thoughts. One of my best weekends this semester was a weekend where I stayed home and worked on homework. I got so much accomplished and felt really good about myself afterwards.

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Our culture’s negative perception of people traveling solo or living alone furthers the idea that people need to be in a meaningful romantic relationship to be happy and satisfied with their life. This is not true. Also, people in relationships need alone time. Being constantly around other people can be overwhelming. For me, I become cranky and impatient if I haven’t had adequate alone time. People also need alone time to discover who they are without the influence of other people. Alone time gives people time to reflect on themselves and think about where they want to go in life. The importance of this cannot be overstated.

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This negative perception of being alone also causes people to become dependent on others.  How would I know how I react to a situation if I am always able to rely on other people? I know people who are terrified of having to do things by themselves, whether that is driving somewhere new or cooking dinner. Being independent is especially important as we grow into adults. My parents are not going to be around to hold my hand once I head off into the “real world,” and someday they won’t be here to guide me. Parents and parental figures need to equip children with the tools to be independent, whether that means doing taxes or laundry.

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To clarify, being alone is different from being lonely. People need support systems to fall back on and people they can rely on for help. The problems occur when people are too dependent on these people, therefore comprising their ability to be satisfied with themselves.

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As a society we need to let the stigma of being alone go. Having alone time is important and so is social time. Different people need varying amounts of this time, which also depends on where they are in their life. Everyone needs alone time, and it isn’t selfish to.